8 mindful tips to help men cope with their anxiety
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
Anxiety happens to most of us, but it can show up differently from person to person. Explore what anxiety can look like in men and 9 tips to help them cope.
Many men grow up hearing messages about how they’re supposed to be tough, stay strong, and keep their emotions in check. But while qualities like resilience, self regulation, and reframing can be helpful in managing life’s ups and downs, relying solely on them can also make it harder to recognize and address mental health challenges like anxiety.
When most people think of anxiety, they may think of feeling nervous or overwhelmed. Maybe the person who’s anxious comes off as fidgety, restless, and looks visibly stressed. Right? While those can be signs of anxiousness, you might be surprised to know that anxiety doesn’t always show up this way. Especially not in men.
Although everyone can experience anxiety, for men, the anxiety symptoms are sometimes a totally different ballgame. And, unfortunately, that may mean they get overlooked.
If you’re experiencing anxiety yourself or trying to support someone you care about, we’ll share our best practices for how men can take control of their mental health and feel more balanced and supported on their journey.
What does anxiety look like in men?
Anxiety is a natural response to a perceived threat. It can happen to anyone at any time. We might think that an anxious person is short of breath, or has sweaty palms, or a pinched, uncomfortable expression on their face, but for many men, anxiety can be more subtle. For this reason, the symptoms aren’t easy to recognize right away.
Here are some of the most common ways anxiety can show up in men:
1. Physical tension and aches: The body responds to anxiety by staying in a fight or flight mode, which can bring muscle tightness, back pain, or headaches. This can happen even if they don’t feel stressed mentally.
2. Irritability and anger: Anxiety can manifest as a short temper or frustration. Small inconveniences may feel overwhelming, and reactions may seem exaggerated.
3. Difficulty sleeping: Feeling symptoms of anxiety can make it hard to fall asleep or stay asleep. Some men experience racing thoughts at night or wake up frequently, and sleep disturbances can worsen anxiety.
4. Trouble concentrating: Brain fog or feeling distracted can mean tasks that used to feel easy might now take longer, which can cause frustration and decrease productivity.
5. Increased heart rate or chest pain: Physical symptoms can occur, like heart palpitations or chest tightness, and that may mimic heart problems, which can add to the overall anxiety.
6. Avoidance behaviors: Ignoring or avoiding social situations, work projects, or daily responsibilities to escape feelings of anxiety may be common. Over time, this can lead to isolation, which may worsen mental health.
How men can help their anxiety: 8 mindful coping tips
Managing anxiety doesn’t have to mean making huge life changes all at once. Often, it’s the small, daily habits that help bring life back into balance. And this can make the biggest difference over time.
Anxiety is a normal part of life (unless it gets out of hand), but when you make coping strategies in your mental health toolbox, you already have tools in place to handle anxiety when it flares up.
Here are some mindful, practical tips to help men manage anxiety in everyday life.
1. Practice deep breathing exercises to feel calmer
When you’re feeling tense or overwhelmed, your breathing tends to get shallow. This sends a signal to your body that something is wrong, which can make anxiety worse. One of the easiest and fastest ways to calm anxiety is by focusing on your breath. Deep breathing can interrupt this cycle by calming the nervous system.
Try this: Breathe in slowly through your nose for four seconds, hold for four seconds, and then exhale through your mouth for four seconds. Repeat this for a few minutes until you start to feel more grounded. Practice this regularly, even when you’re not anxious, and you can train your body to relax more quickly in stressful situations.
💙 Explore our Counting the Breath guided exercise to keep you grounded in the present moment and focused on breathing properly.
2. Get active with regular exercise
Moving your body may release natural mood boosters in your brain and also helps burn off excess energy that can build up when you’re feeling anxious.
Try this: Take a 20-minute walk, bike ride, or do a quick workout at home. Find an activity you enjoy, and aim to move your body a little every day.
3. Limit caffeine and alcohol
Caffeine and alcohol can both worsen anxiety symptoms, even if they feel like they help you cope in the moment. Caffeine can make your heart race and increase restlessness, while alcohol may initially relax you but can disrupt sleep and worsen anxiety the next day.
Try this: Cut back gradually, and try switching to decaf or herbal teas. You can also try non-alcoholic beer and wine or limit alcohol to weekends or special occasions. Pay attention to how your body reacts to these substances so you can see how they link to your anxiety levels.
4. Develop a calming nighttime routine
Good sleep is essential for mental health, but anxiety and racing thoughts can get in the way of rest. A simple, calming nighttime routine can make it easier to wind down and help improve your sleep quality.
Try this: Go to bed at the same time each night, and switch off your screens at least 30 minutes before you sleep so your brain can wind down. Instead, try reading a calming book before bed, or try some mindful movement (try these seven bedtime stretches), or listen to calming music.
💙 Press play on Calm’s Nighttime Wind Down playlist during your nighttime routine to get your body and mind relaxed.
5. Stay connected with others
When you’re feeling anxious, socialising can feel harder. But spending time with friends, family, or even coworkers can help break the cycle of isolation and anxiety.
Try this: You don’t have to open up right away if you’re not ready. Simply spend time with people you trust, even if you aren’t talking about anxiety, as this can create a sense of connection and ease anxious thoughts.
6. Focus on what you can control
A lot of anxiety comes from worrying about things that feel out of your control. While you can’t control everything, you can focus on small, manageable tasks to make things feel less overwhelming.
Try this: Take action on the things you can handle to help shift your focus away from what you can’t. For work-related anxiety, focus on completing one work task at a time instead of worrying about the entire project. With financial anxiety, start by making a simple budget.
7. Try mindfulness or meditation
Mindfulness and meditation can help train your mind to stay in the present moment, so you’re not worrying about the future or dwelling on the past.
Try this: Spend just 5–10 minutes a day meditating. If that feels challenging, start with simple mindfulness exercises, like focusing fully on your surroundings or paying attention to how your body feels in the moment. These 12 meditation tips can also help you with anxiety.
💙 Try this two-minute Balanced and Present meditation by Jeff Warren to help you find peace and calm right now.
8. Accept that it’s okay to ask for help
Sometimes, anxiety can feel too big to manage on your own, and that’s okay. Talking to someone who understands anxiety, like a therapist or counselor, can help you learn new coping skills and grounding techniques (here are 18 we like) that can help you gain insight into what’s causing your symptoms. Many men find that once they try therapy, they wish they’d done it sooner.
Try this: Search for therapists locally or online. Many will offer a free consultation so you can decide whether you vibe with them before you sign up to some sessions.
8 tips for supporting men with anxiety and depression
We all want to support the people who matter to us if they’re going through anxiety or depression, but it can be hard if they aren’t comfortable opening up about their feelings.
Men, in particular, might avoid talking about their mental health due to societal pressure to “stay strong” or handle problems on their own. But even if they don’t say much, knowing that someone is there and willing to help can ease some of the weight they’re carrying.
If someone you care about is struggling with anxiety or depression, here are simple and practical ways to offer support.
1. Listen without trying to fix things
When someone talks about their anxiety, it’s natural to want to offer solutions or cheer them up. But, often what they really need is for someone to hear them out without judgment. Let them share at their own pace, and resist the urge to “fix” the situation. Use phrases like “I hear you,” or, “That sounds really tough,” to show empathy without trying to minimize their feelings.
If they aren’t ready to talk, that’s okay too. Simply reminding them that you’re available when they are can provide comfort.
2. Encourage healthy routines
When anxiety or depression takes hold, even basic routines can feel overwhelming. Gentle encouragement in small, positive habits can help. You might invite them for a walk, suggest doing a low-key activity together, or offer to cook a meal together. Sometimes just getting out of the house can lift their mood.
Avoid pushing too hard, though. Aim to create opportunities, not pressure. Keep the focus on spending time together, not on fixing how they feel.
3. Check in regularly
Letting someone know you’re thinking about them helps them feel less alone. Even if they don’t respond right away, consistent check-ins show that you care and that they matter.
Send a simple, “How’s your day going?” or, “Thinking of you,” and you’ll remind them you’re there, without the pressure to get into a deep conversation.
4. Help with practical tasks
Anxiety and depression can make even simple tasks feel exhausting, so offering to help with everyday chores can relieve some of their stress. Help out with errands, cleaning, or paperwork. Sometimes, just sitting with them while they tackle their to-do list can provide motivation and reduce feelings of overwhelm.
Ask directly if there’s anything specific they need. If they hesitate, offer small, concrete suggestions like picking up some groceries for them or getting together to do your laundry.
5. Respect their boundaries
Everyone copes differently. Some men may need space, while others appreciate more active involvement. Pay attention to their cues and respect their boundaries to find the right balance. If they withdraw, let them know you’re available when they’re ready but avoid pushing too hard for interaction.
6. Normalize conversations about mental health
Talking openly about mental health can help reduce the stigma that many men feel. If you’re comfortable, share your own experiences with stress, anxiety, or times when you felt overwhelmed. This can make them feel less isolated and more willing to open up about their feelings.
You can even look at our Feelings Wheel together to help them find the right words.
7. Encourage professional support if needed
If anxiety or depression seems to be interfering with their daily life, gently encourage them to seek professional help. Sometimes, hearing this from someone they trust can make it easier to take the first step.
You can offer to help by researching therapists, attending the first appointment with them, or simply being supportive during the process. Let them know that reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
8. Be patient and understanding
Recovery from anxiety or depression can bring good days and bad days, and setbacks are normal. Try to remain patient and understanding, and remind them that progress, no matter how small, is still progress. If you’re struggling with patience, these seven tips can help.
With that said, if trying to support someone in your life who’s dealing with anxiety begins to affect your mental health, it’s always okay to create boundaries and give yourself space to nurture yourself too.
Anxiety in men FAQs
What triggers anxiety in men?
Anxiety in men can be triggered by all kinds of different factors, including work stress, financial pressure, relationship issues, or major life changes like becoming a parent or dealing with health problems. For many, it’s a buildup of lots of smaller stressors. Men may also experience anxiety without a clear trigger, as it can sometimes surface unexpectedly.
Talking about anxiety and its causes can help us all normalize it in society, which can help reduce the stigma and make it easier for men to take proactive steps to manage it and feel better. And that helps everyone.
Are there specific therapies for treating anxiety in men?
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can be one of the most effective treatments for anxiety in men. It focuses on changing negative thought patterns to more positive ways of seeing situations.
Mindfulness-based therapies and exposure therapy can also be helpful, depending on the type of anxiety. In some cases, medication may be recommended alongside therapy to manage symptoms.
Exploring different types of therapy can help men find an approach that feels right for them, and the different types each offer practical tools that appeal to men who are ready to support their long-term mental health.
Can lifestyle changes impact anxiety levels in men?
Making lifestyle changes can make a big difference for men looking to reduce feelings of anxiety. They aren’t a quick fix, but their consistent practice helps create a strong foundation for feeling calmer.
Engage in regular exercise, enjoy a healthy diet, and get good quality sleep. These can help stabilize mood and lower stress levels.
Limit caffeine and alcohol, as both substances can worsen anxiety symptoms.
Add simple habits like daily walks, relaxing before bed, and staying connected with others.
Is it common for men to experience anxiety alongside depression?
Anxiety and depression often occur together in men. Anxiety can drain energy and lead to feelings of hopelessness, while depression can heighten worry and restlessness. Men may show symptoms differently than women, often withdrawing, feeling irritable, or losing interest in activities.
Recognizing the overlap between anxiety and depression is important, because treating one can often help with the other. Therapy, medication, and healthy routines can address both conditions, which, over time, can improve overall mental health.
What is the 3–3–3 rule for anxiety?
The 3–3–3 rule is a grounding technique used to calm anxiety by interrupting anxious thoughts, bringing attention to your surroundings, and focusing on the present. It’s a quick, discreet method that can be used anywhere, including in moments of intense anxiety, so it’s a useful, practical tool for everyday life. Here’s how to do it:
Name three things you see
Identify three sounds you hear
Move three parts of your body
Calm your mind. Change your life.
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