How to ease holiday stress: 6 tips to survive the holidays
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA
Holiday stress is real, but there are ways to manage it. Learn how to survive the holidays with your mental health intact using our 6 stress-busting tips.
There’s no two ways about it — the holidays can be incredibly stressful. Between social engagements, family time, decorating, buying gifts, and the expectation to do it all with a smile on your face, it’s a lot. It’s no wonder why 88% of Americans consider the holidays to be the most stressful time of year.
Not only are the holidays jam-packed with stress, but many people find this time of year to be a tough time emotionally. If you’re feeling lonely, grieving a loss, missing family members who have passed, etc… you might find the holidays to be an isolating, or melancholy time. And if that sounds like you, trust us, you’re not alone.
The good news is that there are ways to cope with these difficult feelings. Some of our favorite tips can help you get through the holiday season with a bit more ease.
Mental health and the holidays
Sometimes the holidays can feel intense because of past holiday trauma or discomfort. If you had a difficult holiday season where someone passed away, or if family holidays were particularly laden with family drama, there can be anticipatory anxiety surrounding this supposed most wonderful time of the year.
Family dynamics can certainly be challenging, but so can spending the holidays alone. If you’re overseas, away from family, or if your work doesn’t allow you to travel to see people, the holidays can be even more isolating. Here are some additional stressors that can crop up during the holidays:
Financial strain
Societal expectations
Over-eating
Drinking too much alcohol
Social anxieties
Lack of sleep
How to mentally prepare for holiday stress
The best defense is sometimes a good offense, so here are some ways you can mentally prepare for going into the holiday season.
Establish good boundaries
One of the best ways to safeguard your mental health and wellbeing is to establish clear boundaries with those in your social circle and support system. While it can feel scary to set boundaries sometimes, do so with kindness and clarity. You might feel the desire to set boundaries but might not know exactly where to start and that’s where self-awareness and mental clarity come in.
Practice self-awareness
Setting realistic expectations and knowing what triggers you can be a great place to start in setting appropriate boundaries. Maybe you’re single and it’s triggering to have family members ask you when you’re going to settle down and get married. Or maybe you hold different political beliefs than those you’ll be spending time with and they like to talk politics at the dinner table. Maybe you have siblings or family members whose lives are constantly being compared to yours. It can be helpful to know what sorts of conversations trigger you and stress you out.
Plan ahead
If you have keen foresight from the holidays of the past, and alarm bells are already going off in your mind, get ahead of it. It’s okay to call grandma and gently remind her that while you know she cares about you, you’d prefer not to discuss your personal life at the next gathering. Or let Uncle Jim know that you’re not interested in re-hashing current events over coffee and dessert. You have every right to ask for what you need and as long as you’re finding kind and thoughtful ways to communicate these things, you’ll be far ahead of the curve.
6 mindful tips for surviving the holidays with less stress
Go into the holiday season prepared and ready for anything with these mindful tips.
1. Set an intention to care for yourself
Any time you’re going to experience extreme stress, it’s important to prioritize self-care. This means allowing yourself to take breaks when you need them, asking for help and delegating tasks, and above all else, not expecting yourself to do more than you’re able to do.
💙 If you’re feeling overwhelmed try taking a break with a short meditation like Breathe into Relaxation with Jay Shetty.
2. Manage stress with mindfulness and relaxation techniques
One of the best ways to manage the stress that you know is coming is to have some mindfulness and relaxation exercises ready in your back pocket. These could be yoga practices you like, meditation sessions you enjoy, mindful movement, or even breathwork.
💙 Having some tools in your mental health “toolbelt” to manage stress and anxiety is key during the holidays. Check out our Overcome Stress & Anxiety series.
3. Prioritize sleep
Holiday stress can take its toll on the body, so if you know you’ll be facing some mental and physical fatigue, stock up on sleep beforehand, and make sure you prioritize it during the holiday season.
💙 When your mind is full with a running list of to-dos, it can be hard to unwind. When you’re ready to calm your busy brain, try our When It’s Hard to Fall Asleep meditation.
4. Resist comparing your holiday to others
Your holiday is unique to you and your life. Even if you’re seeing a lot of picture-perfect holidays on someone’s social media feed, let go of the need to compare if you can. And even if you can’t, just remember that your experience is meant for you.
5. Try to focus on the positive (when appropriate)
It might sound a bit hokey, but there can be a lot of beautiful parts about the holiday season. When you feel those positive, warm moments, soak them up and enjoy them.
💙 Focusing on what you’re grateful for can help put a positive spin on things during challenging times. Check out our Gratitude masterclass to help support your gratitude practice.
6. Seek support when needed
If the impending holiday season has your stress levels reaching an unmanageable level, it’s always wise to seek advice and consultation with your healthcare provider. In some cases, a therapist or counselor can help you to manage your feelings so that you can approach the holidays with a sense of calm.
Surviving the holidays FAQs
How do you survive the holidays?
Getting through the holidays requires a mixture of setting boundaries and making self-care a priority. Managing stress, taking breaks, asking for help when needed and removing pressure from yourself by setting realistic expectations.
Why is the holiday season so hard?
For many, the holiday season is difficult because there can be pressure or tension from family dynamics and even just extended time spent with family. For others, isolation and loneliness can be a factor, particularly if someone who was important to you is no longer in your life. These difficulties can be handled by implementing good self-care practices and taking time to rest and take breaks during the season.
How do you deal with grief over the holidays?
Everyone’s experience with grief is unique. Depending on who you’re grieving there are different tactics you may try. If someone in your life has passed away, it can feel meaningful to pay tribute to them in some way during your holiday time. This might mean giving a toast to them at a dinner, playing their favorite song, or keeping a tradition they loved. If someone has left your life more recently, you might need practices that offer more immediate relief like breathwork, or meditation. If you’re having a tough time managing grief, a mental health professional can be helpful.
How do you take care of yourself during the holiday season?
The holidays can be very stressful so prioritizing sleep is hugely important. When you’re stressed it can impact your immune system. Sleep and rest, as well as hydration and nutrition, can play a vital role in keeping you healthy and well.
What can I do if I feel overwhelmed during the holidays?
Take breaks! The best thing for your mental health and overall wellbeing is to take breaks when you feel overwhelmed. Breaks can look any way you want them to. You can take time to implement a mindfulness practice, sit and journal, take a nap, or even just sit quietly and listen to your favorite music. There is no wrong way to take a break!
Calm your mind. Change your life.
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