How to deal with homesickness? 8 tips to ease homesickness
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA
What to do when you're homesick? Here's how to deal with homesickness in college, on vacation, or in life. Plus, the symptoms and how long homesickness lasts.
Homesickness can happen to anyone. Whether you’re starting your first year at college or living in a new city, missing your familiar surroundings is normal. Homesickness isn't just about wanting your family’s home cooked meals or to sleep in your own bed—it's a deep yearning for the habitual and comforting aspects of home.
What is homesickness?
Homesickness is a feeling that comes when you're in a new or unfamiliar environment, and all you want is to be back in a comforting place. It’s the distress caused by being away from your home and can occur regardless of your age or reason for being away from what's familiar to you. Many people experience homesickness because they miss their connection to the people, places, and routines that make them feel safe and happy.
When we step out of our comfort zone, our brains may signal feelings of longing for what we’ve left behind. It’s a common response to a drastic change, and it reinforces your ability to form strong attachments to the people and places you love. That's a good thing! Even if it doesn't feel so great at the time.
If you find yourself in a new place feeling a bit out of sorts and thinking about home a lot, you could be experiencing homesickness. And while it may feel overwhelming now, understanding your feelings is the first step in making it through.
What are the symptoms of homesickness?
When you're homesick, your body and brain give you signals that something isn’t right. Recognizing the symptoms of homesickness isn't always easy, but knowing what to look for can help you understand your feelings.
1. Homesickness can make you feel sad
Any time we’re in transition, it’s normal to feel some grief. If you’re dealing with homesickness, you might feel a sadness that lingers. And you don’t always know why.
2. Homesickness can make it hard to focus
Concentrating on tasks or conversations can become difficult, because your thoughts keep turning back to home. It might be hard to focus on tasks like work, studying, or even spending time with friends.
3. Homesickness can make you miss your old home
You find yourself thinking a lot about home. You could daydream about spending time with your family, your pet, or even things like missing your own bed or a familiar grocery store.
4. Homesickness can make you feel emotionally ‘off’
You might be easily annoyed and find things that usually wouldn’t bother you suddenly will. You could also just have the distinct feeling that you’re not yourself.
5. Homesickness can lower motivation
Activities or hobbies that you normally enjoy might not interest you as much due to an overall lack of motivation and drive to participate.
6. Homesickness can make you want to be alone
Even though being around others could help, you might prefer to spend a lot of time by yourself, as experiencing homesickness can lead to difficulties adjusting socially.
7. Homesickness can lead to eating and sleeping differently
Homesickness can affect your appetite and sleeping habits. You might not feel as hungry as usual, or you could be eating more. You might struggle to sleep, or you might find yourself sleeping more than normal.
8. Homesickness can manifest as physical symptoms
Homesickness may make you feel physically unwell, bringing on a headache, stomachache, or lethargy and can mirror the physical effects of depression.
How long does homesickness last?
The duration of feeling homesick is different for everyone. Some people might start to feel better after a few days, while others take longer. The important thing to remember is that homesickness isn’t usually permanent. As you start to get used to the new places, faces, and routines, homesickness often begins to fade.
What can make homesickness linger?
Staying in your new space all day without going outside or talking to anyone can make homesickness last longer. However, trying to do too much at once can also keep homesickness hanging around, because you're not giving yourself time to adjust. Forgetting to take care of yourself—like not getting enough sleep or skipping meals—can make it tougher to shake off those homesick feelings.
Give yourself time to settle in, and then get out and do things. Be patient with yourself as you adapt to your new environment. It’s okay to take it one step at a time.
What not to do when you’re feeling homesick: 4 behaviors to avoid
If you're feeling homesick, there are certain activities it can be helpful to avoid in order to help feel better. It might take some effort, but by following these steps, you'll start to feel more at home in your new surroundings.
1. Scrolling on social media: Spending lots of time on social media can make you feel more out of touch with your surroundings. It's easy to get caught up in what everyone back home is doing, so limit your time on the various platforms. Try setting app limits on your phone or picking up a book instead.
2. Spending too much time alone: It's tempting to keep to yourself when you're missing home, but try to join in on activities and meet new friends. Being around others can help lift your spirits if you’re feeling lonely.
3. Making impulsive decisions: Feeling homesick can lead to rash decisions, like wanting to drop everything and go home. Give yourself time to think things through before acting on these urges.
4. Ignoring your health: Don't let your wellbeing fall to the wayside. Make sure you eat well, get enough sleep, move your body, and tend to your personal hygiene. Looking after your physical health is an important piece in feeling well mentally.
What to do when you’re feeling homesick: 8 tips to deal with homesickness
Use these tips to help you feel and deal with your homesick feelings and in time you may begin to feel better.
1. Talk it out with someone you trust
Connect with someone you trust and let them know how you're feeling. It could be a friend, a family member, or a counselor. Sharing your thoughts can lighten your load and make you feel less alone.
💙 Learn about Vulnerability in the Daily Calm, and how sharing our true feelings is an act of strength.
2. Get back to your routine
Set up your day with a familiar structure. Have a set time for meals, study, relaxation, and exercise that mirror your old routine, if you’re able. Routines can make your new environment feel more predictable and comfortable, helping ease feelings of loneliness.
💙 If you’re not able to keep your old routines, let Jay Shetty help you find acceptance and create New Routines that will help you learn more about yourself.
3. Get involved in your new community
Join a club, a sports team, or another group related to your interests. Being part of a community can give you a sense of belonging and distract you from homesick feelings.
💙 If you’re worried about fitting into your new community, let the Daily Jay remind you that You Belong.
4. Stay active to boost your mood
Go for a walk, hit the gym, or do some yoga. Physical activity can be a great mood booster and even help clear your mind. It’s also a great way to release stress or frustration if your new chapter is feeling difficult.
💙 Start your morning with Mel Mah’s Daily Move to engage in some mindful movement.
5. Keep a journal to process your feelings
Write down your experiences and feelings in a physical (or digital) journal. This can help you process your emotions and track your progress as you adjust to your new setting.
💙 If you want some guidance on journaling, let Dr. Julie help you Clarify Your Feelings Through Writing.
6. Personalize your space
Bring a bit of home to your new place. Decorate with photos, keepsakes, or anything that brings you comfort.
7. Explore your surroundings
Get to know your new environment. Find a comforting café, a peaceful park, or any spot that sparks your interest. Making new memories and establishing new routines can help you feel more at home.
8. Practice mindfulness
Take some time each day to focus on the present moment. Try meditation or mindful breathing exercises to stay calm and centered.
💙 Try this 2-minute Balanced and Present meditation to help you find a moment of calm in your day.
How to deal with homesickness FAQs
What makes homesickness worse?
Certain moments in life can amplify the feelings of homesickness. Staying isolated, focusing on the negative parts of your new environment, or talking to family and friends back home too often can actually make homesickness feel more intense. It's a bit like constantly reminding yourself of what you're missing, which isn't helpful. Instead, try to engage with the environment and people around you in your new community. This doesn't mean you forget your loved ones back home, but balancing contact with living in the present can help ease those homesick feelings.
How long is it normal to feel homesick for?
There's no exact timeline for feeling homesick. For some people, it might be just a few days. For others, it could be weeks or even longer. It's all about how quickly you adapt to your new environment. The key is not to rush yourself or feel bad if it seems to take a while. Be kind to yourself, and give yourself permission to feel whatever you're feeling. Homesickness is completely normal, and, with time, those feelings will start to diminish as you get more settled.
Should you go home when homesick?
Going home when you're feeling homesick might seem like the perfect fix, but it's not always the best answer. If you go home every time you feel homesick, you might miss out on the chance to make new connections and find your place in the new environment. Instead, try to work through your feelings and establish a sense of home where you are. However, a quick visit home could be refreshing if it's been a long time—just make sure you're returning for the right reasons and not running away from the challenge of adapting.
What triggers homesickness?
Different scenarios can trigger homesickness. It could be a smell that reminds you of home, a holiday when you’d usually be with family, or even seeing someone else who seems to be missing their home. These triggers can bring a sudden wave of homesickness. The best way to deal with triggers is to recognize them and understand that they'll pop up now and then. Make a plan to tackle these feelings when homesickness arises, like calling a friend, doing something fun, or treating yourself to something nice.
Calm your mind. Change your life.
Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life.
Images: Getty
