The Rules Of Tennis: A Love Story, read by John McEnroe

The rules of tennis are now a bedtime story for grown-ups narrated by the one and only, all-time tennis great and legend of the game, John McEnroe.

Just to be clear, the rules of tennis are not the subject of the story; they ARE the story – read aloud, in loving detail and the slow, soothing tones of one of the greatest tennis players who’s ever lived. This Sleep Story was made possible in partnership with Wimbledon sponsor, American Express.  

Granted, there’s not much of a plot and some of the rules are less riveting than others. But on the plus side, the new Sleep Story contains some wonderful minutiae.

It’s not just the perfect way to lull yourself to sleep after a stressful day but also the perfect way to calm your frazzled nerves when your player is down break-point at the tail-end of a nail-biter and the tension is more than you can bear.

Our new Sleep Story is called “But Seriously, the Rules Of Tennis.”

It is, in other words, both a sleep aid ... and a stressbuster. Who could ask for more? If you’re reaching your own break-point, Calm’s latest Sleep Story is the perfect antidote.

Before we say more, however, let us tell you a different story ...

Once upon a time ... long, long ago ... there lived a young man, known around the world for his golden talent and ... his fiery temper.

This young man seemed at once both blessed and cursed.

He was known for his skills as the golden boy of tennis, capable of artistry that seemed at times like magic – a young wizard of the game.

At the same time, however, he was also known, for losing his cool. True, he loved the game of tennis ... but he seemed to be a stickler for the rules and how they were applied. “You cannot be serious!” he once shouted at an umpire after a close line-call had gone against him. And not, truth to tell, in a friendly way.

This young man, it sometimes seemed, viewed not just the officials of the game but also, at times, the very rules themselves, as, in another vivid phrase of his, “the absolute pits of the world”.

Flash forward many years ...

Any resemblance between that young man and John McEnroe, tennis legend, and pillar and sage of the tennis world, may seem hard to credit ... but believe us, it is so.

This story tells us that ... a man can change. And this one has. He has, as they say in Hollywood, gone on a journey.

Fortunately for Calm, the latest stop on this journey finds the legendary John McEnroe reading a Sleep Story, designed not just to soothe the restless souls of tennis fans and others, but also, vitally, to remind us of the tennis rules that some of us may have forgotten or never knew; the very rules, for that matter, to which he himself once was such a stickler for.

The modern Rules of Lawn Tennis were first drawn up in 1875 by – you won’t guess, so we’ll tell you – the Marylebone Cricket Club. They were adopted two years by The All England Lawn Tennis and Croquet Club and used at the first Lawn Tennis Championship, at Wimbledon in 1877.

There have, of course, been modifications since but the basic rules remain essentially the same.

Our new Sleep Story version of the rules covers everything from court and ball dimensions to clothing and equipment malfunction; and, not least, when to call for new balls for the third set.

It also covers every aspect of how the umpire may strike back against code violations and unsportsmanlike behaviour.

We hope you enjoy our new Sleep Story.