How to be more resilient: 8 ways to build your resilience

Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA

Learn what resilience means, how it impacts our stress and emotions, and the common barriers to being resilient. Plus, 8 ways to build your resilience. 

In life, we all encounter difficult and unexpected circumstances. Resilience is a crucial skill that can help us face the unpredictability of life and thrive in the face of adversity. 

Whether it's coping with daily stressors at work, significant life changes, or everyday challenges, understanding and building resilience can transform our approach to life's problems. It can give us the inner strength to rebound from setbacks, adapt to change, and keep moving forward.

 

What does resilience mean?

Resilience is our ability to spring back from tough times. It allows us to approach life's challenges head-on and emerging stronger and wiser. In other words, it's about adaptability and growth. When something unexpected happens, being resilient means acknowledging the difficulties, adjusting your path, learning from experiences, and finding healthy ways to move forward with a renewed sense of purpose. 

Resilient people look for solutions, lean on their support systems, and stay hopeful even in moments of high stress. Anyone can learn and develop resilience over time, with every challenge bringing an opportunity to grow. 

Resilience shows up in the courage to try again after a failure, the strength to seek help when things get overwhelming, and the tenacity to keep pursuing your goals despite obstacles you face. A resilient mindset empowers you to handle life's ups and downs with grace and strength. 

Common barriers to resilience

Building resilience isn’t always straightforward, and certain experiences can make it more difficult. Fortunately, understanding the challenges presented by each of these barriers can help you find strategies and support to overcome them. 

Long-term health issues: Chronic physical or mental health conditions can drain your resilience, so it's important to recognize the extra challenges they bring. Consult with healthcare professionals to manage your condition effectively and seek support groups to connect with others facing similar challenges.

Discrimination: Experiencing discrimination can be a significant barrier to resilience. Seek communities and mentors who can provide emotional support and practical advice.

Strained relationships: Difficult relationships with family or friends can impact your resilience.  Open a dialogue with those involved, or seek the help of a mediator or counselor for guidance, as they can help you heal or manage these relationships while deepening emotional connection.

Loneliness: Feeling alone can hinder resilience building. Try joining community groups or online forums that align with your interests to start building new connections.

Financial struggles: Financial stress can be a significant barrier for resilience. Explore community resources or financial counseling services for guidance on managing financial challenges.

Access to services: Limited access to essential services, like healthcare or education, can affect resilience. Research local organizations or government programs designed to provide support in these areas.

Single parents: Single parenting comes with unique challenges that can affect resilience. Building a support network with local or online support groups where you can share experiences and advice can be extremely helpful.

Caregivers: Caregiving can be exhausting, making building resilience difficult. Schedule regular breaks, and seek respite services to make sure you have an opportunity for self-care wherever possible.

Living conditions: Substandard housing can impact your ability to cope. Try investigating local housing assistance programs or support services that may be able to help improve your living situation.

 

The 7 C’s of resilience

The path to building more resilience is different for everyone, but there are certain qualities that can help you on your journey. By understanding and cultivating the Seven C’s of resilience, you can gain a foundation for facing difficult times. 

1. Competence

Being competent means you're prepared for, and capable of handling, difficult situations. You have the skills needed to face challenges effectively and apply your knowledge when a problem arises so you can face challenges head-on.

2. Confidence

Confidence is a sense of self-worth that means you trust your own judgment and abilities, even in tough times. Confidence doesn't mean you won't ever feel unsure or scared, but when these feelings come, you believe you can overcome them.

3. Connection

Strong, positive relationships are important for resilience. Connections with family, friends, and colleagues can help provide support and advice when you need it. They can bring comfort and guidance when things get tough, reminding you you're not alone.

4. Character

Character is about knowing who you are and staying true to your values and principles, even under pressure. It involves understanding the difference between positive and negative, and what that means for you, and choosing to do what's in your best interest. People with strong character are often seen as reliable and trustworthy in the face of adversity.

5. Contribution

Making a positive impact on the world around you can significantly boost your resilience. Contributing to others, whether it's volunteering, donating money, or simply being kind, can help you feel more connected and purposeful. A sense of contribution can be empowering during tough times.

6. Coping

Healthy ways to deal with stress and hardship are essential for resilience. Coping strategies might include activities like exercise, meditation, talking to a friend, or engaging in a hobby. These can help you manage emotions and stay grounded during challenging times.

7. Control

Understanding the aspects of your life that you can influence—and accepting those you can't—allows you to focus on what you can change and let go of things beyond your control. This can reduce feelings of helplessness while empowering you to take positive actions where you can.

 

Learn how to build resilience with these 8 strategies

Resilience is a skill that can be developed and enhanced over time. Building resilience involves adopting strategies that strengthen your ability to deal with life's challenges. Whether it's learning how to be resilient at work, how to be emotionally resilient, or how to be resilient to stress, use these strategies as a starting point for your resilience-building journey.

1. Nurture strong relationships

Relationships are your support network. Invest time and effort in building and maintaining good relationships with family, friends, and colleagues.

Reach out to someone you trust and plan a regular activity together, like a weekly coffee catch-up or a walking session.

💙 Explore the Relationships with Others Series to discover how to make the connections in your life more meaningful.

2. Prioritize physical health

Your physical wellbeing significantly impacts your resilience. A healthy body can cope better with stress and recover faster from illness or fatigue. 

💙 Start to improve your health by incorporating a simple exercise routine into your daily schedule, like a 30-minute stroll to Walk Away Stress or a short yoga session.

3. Discover your purpose

A sense of purpose can give you direction and motivation, especially during tough times. It can be found in your job, hobbies, volunteering, or relationships. 

💙 Make a list of goals that align with what you’re passionate about and work toward them with the help of Jay Shetty’s Fight for Your Passion meditation.

4. Embrace change

Accepting and adapting to change can make you more resilient and flexible. Identify a recent change in your life and journal what new opportunities or learning experiences it brought you.

💙 Practicing riding the inevitable Waves of Change in your life with this short meditation. 

 

5. Build self-confidence

Confidence in your abilities can help you face challenges more effectively. List your strengths, accomplishments, and learnings from failure to remind yourself of your capabilities.

💙 Prepare for life’s key moments with meditations from The Confidence Series

6. Maintain perspective

Acknowledge your feelings around a given situation, but also consider the bigger picture to help prevent you from getting overwhelmed. When faced with a challenge, write down both positive and negative aspects to maintain a balanced view. 

💙 If you tend to get overwhelmed with negative thoughts, use this practice to Shift Your Perspective, and relate to your thoughts in a healthier way. 

7. Develop problem-solving skills

Feeling able to solve problems can enhance your resilience because it can help you feel empowered to take action. Next time you face a problem, brainstorm possible solutions before deciding what to do.

8. Learn stress management techniques

Effective stress management is crucial during difficult times. Explore stress-relief activities—like meditation, breathing exercises, yoga, therapy, walking, or journaling—to find what works best for you.

💙 Shake Off Your Tension with a short practice to soothe your nervous system.

 

How to be resilient FAQs 

What are the 7 C's of resilience?

The 7 C’s of resilience are a set of key qualities that help build resilience. Together, these 7 C’s form a comprehensive framework for understanding and developing resilience.

  1. Competence is having the skills to handle challenges.

  2. Confidence is believing in your own abilities. 

  3. Connection is having strong relationships.

  4. Character is knowing and staying true to your values.

  5. Contribution is making a positive impact in the world.

  6. Coping is having strategies to deal with stress.

  7. Control is understanding what you can change and accepting what you can't. 

How can I build my resilience?

Building resilience includes a combination of strategies and practices. These practices can help strengthen your ability to bounce back from adversity and grow from your experiences. Building resilience is a personal journey, so adapt these strategies to fit your unique needs and circumstances.

  • Nurturing strong relationships for support

  • Taking care of your physical health

  • Finding and pursuing your purpose

  • Embracing change

  • Building self-confidence

  • Maintaining perspective in difficult situations

  • Developing problem-solving skills

  • Learning effective stress management techniques. 

What are the 7 techniques of resilience?

The seven techniques of resilience are closely aligned with the 7 C’s of resilience. They are steps you can take to increase your ability to overcome difficult times. Each technique represents a specific area to focus on, and together they provide a holistic approach to building resilience.

  1. Developing competence in handling life's challenges.

  2. Building confidence in your abilities.

  3. Fostering strong connections with others.

  4. Cultivating a strong character.

  5. Making meaningful contributions to your community or society.

  6. Learning coping strategies for stress.

  7. Exercising control over your actions and responses.

How can you be resilient at work? 

Being resilient at work involves several key steps. These strategies can help you navigate workplace challenges and thrive in your professional life.

  1. Build strong relationships with colleagues to provide support and collaboration. 

  2. Maintain a healthy work-life balance to ensure you're taking care of your overall wellbeing. 

  3. Set realistic goals to avoid unnecessary stress. 

  4. Develop your problem-solving skills and adaptability to handle workplace challenges effectively. 

  5. Practice stress management techniques, like taking short breaks or deep breathing, to stay calm and focused. 

How can you be emotionally resilient?

Emotional resilience is the ability to manage and bounce back from emotional challenges. To build emotional resilience, start by acknowledging and understanding your emotions. Self-care is crucial, so make time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Developing a strong support network of family and friends can provide emotional support and perspective. Learning coping strategies like mindfulness or journaling to process emotions healthily. 

Building emotional resilience is a continual process of learning and growth, so be patient with yourself. Be open to professional help if you're struggling to manage your emotions.


Calm your mind. Change your life.

Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life. 

Images: Getty

 
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