8 tips to help you cultivate an attitude of gratitude

Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA

Learn about the importance of gratitude for your physical and mental health. Plus, 8 tips to bridge the gap and cultivate an attitude of gratitude.

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s true that we have more access to modern comforts and conveniences than ever before, but it’s also true that most of us are more anxious and stressed than ever before. We so often find ourselves wanting more, searching for what’s next, and dwelling on what we don’t have rather than what we do have. 

So, given how much we do have to be grateful for, why is it that we are so discontent? 

It turns out that recognizing what we have is only one part of the gratitude equation. There is a gap in many of our gratitude practices, and if we want to soak up all the benefits that gratitude provides, we have to take our practice to the next level.

 

Understanding gratitude

Gratitude is a deep and sincere feeling of thankfulness and appreciation for the gifts of life. This could be kindness or generosity from another person, or an acknowledgement of the blessings of our life in general. It’s both an emotion and a positive attitude that transcends cultural boundaries and taps into our shared humanity. 

The concept of gratitude has appeared in various forms across the world's history. From Native American rituals of thanksgiving to Asian philosophies emphasizing humility and appreciation, expressions of gratitude are woven into the fabric of so many different cultures and traditions. 

Gratitude is a universal language that fosters connection, promotes cooperation and reinforces bonds within our communities. So important to a thriving community, gratitude likely played a role in our ancestors' survival and, as a result, our very existence.

And gratitude still plays an important role in our wellbeing. Research has shown that practicing gratitude reduces stress, boosts mental and physical health, and enhances overall life satisfaction. People who practice gratitude experience more positive emotions, increased empathy, build stronger relationships, and better deal with adversity.

What is the gratitude gap?

The practice of gratitude has two elements. First is the inward element of recognizing all that you’re grateful for in your life. Second is the outward element of expressing this gratitude with others, especially those inspiring it. 

Most of us experience those inward feelings of thankfulness, appreciation and warmth towards the kindness or blessings we receive from others. But, in the hectic pace of our daily lives, less than half of us will ever express it outwardly. 

This disparity between the feelings of gratitude we experience and our expression of that gratitude is known as the "gratitude gap".

Why does it matter? Well, without this important second step of gratitude, you may not reap all the rewards. Because positively affecting others with your appreciation is where the magic really happens. 

Without this expression, we miss the opportunity to strengthen relationships, foster goodwill, and encourage the cycle of giving and receiving. Acknowledging the support and contributions of others is a big source of motivation and inspiration in a community, whether it’s at home, at school or at work.

 

Benefits of having a gratitude practice 

Here's a closer look at the wide ranging benefits of cultivating gratitude in our lives.

Gratitude can elevate mood

Expressing gratitude can be a direct route to happiness. It can stimulates the release of "feel-good" neurotransmitters, such as dopamine and serotonin, which help to elevate mood and create a sense of wellbeing.

Gratitude can help reduce envy

Gratitude helps us focus on what we have rather than what we lack, possibly reducing feelings of envy and jealousy. By appreciating our blessings, we can find contentment and joy in the present.

Gratitude can increase resilience

Grateful individuals tend to have greater emotional resilience. They can better cope with adversity, as the positive perspective fostered by gratitude helps them reframe challenging situations and find silver linings.

Gratitude can improve your sleep

Gratitude has been linked to better sleep quality and duration. By calming the mind and reducing stress, it contributes to a more restful night's sleep.

Gratitude can reduce stress

Gratitude is a natural stress-buster. It can help to possibly reduce the production of stress hormones like cortisol, leading to a more relaxed and composed state of mind.

Gratitude has cardiovascular benefits

Some studies suggest that practicing gratitude may have cardiovascular benefits. Reduced stress and inflammation, along with enhanced emotional wellbeing, can contribute to a healthier heart.

Gratitude can help foster better relationships

Expressing gratitude within relationships can strengthen bonds. When people feel appreciated and valued, they are more likely to invest in and nurture those connections.

Gratitude can enhance empathy

Grateful individuals tend to be more empathetic and considerate of others' feelings. They are attuned to the support they receive and are more likely to reciprocate kindness.

Gratitude creates a positive social environment

A culture of gratitude can create a positive social environment. When people regularly express thankfulness, it encourages others to do the same, leading to a cycle of positivity and kindness.

 

8 tips to help close the gratitude gap 

So why, given its benefits, don’t we share the love? 

Many of us believe it’s unnecessary, unimportant, too hard, or just plain embarrassing to verbalize our gratitude. Especially at work. We let our (sometimes subconscious) fears of how our words will be received, or how we will be perceived, stop us from expressing our affection. 

But it doesn’t have to be this way. 

Sure, it can be vulnerable to openly share gratitude, but it’s a risk worth taking. Use these 8 tips to help you close the gratitude gap and soak up all the benefits of gratitude in your life.

1. Practice mindfulness 

In order to feel the gratitude that’s present throughout your day, it’s helpful to have a practice of grounding in the present. This could be through meditation, deep breathing or time in nature, or any other technique that helps you stay focused on the ‘now’. 

💙 Check out this session on a Grateful Mindset with Tamara Levitt.

2. Verbalize your gratitude

Make it a daily habit to express gratitude to others. Whether it's a family member, friend, or coworker, take a moment to thank someone sincerely for their kindness or support (no matter how small). Try to be specific about what it was that you appreciated.

💙 Another great way to express your gratitude is to take up journaling. You can use our Mindfulness Journal to express gratitude.

3. Take a gratitude walk 

As you stroll through your neighborhood or a nearby park, observe and internally express gratitude for the beauty of nature, the fresh air, or the peaceful surroundings.

💙 Learn more about practicing mindfulness on walks with our Mindful Walking meditation.

4. Use tech reminders to support your gratitude practice

Set daily reminders on your phone or computer to take a gratitude break. Let these prompts help you pause, reflect, and find moments of thankfulness throughout your busy day.

💙 You can use Calm’s check-in reminders as a way to remind you to practice gratitude.

 

5. Reframe negative situations 

When faced with challenges, make a conscious effort to reframe them in a more realistic or, if you’re able, a more positive light . Try to find a silver lining or consider the lessons learned from difficult experiences. This perspective shift can help you embrace gratitude even in adversity.

💙 For a little guidance, check out Reframe the Problem from the Daily Jay.

6. Start with gratitude 

Make a habit of starting each meal, meeting, or gathering in your day with a quick outward expression of gratitude. Maybe it's for the food you're eating, the work of your coworkers, or the love of the family and friends you’re with. 

💙 Enhance your gratitude practice with this Gratitude Session from the Daily Calm. 

7. Commit to a gratitude buddy 

Share your daily gratitude with a friend or loved one. Through a quick text, email, or in person chat, check-in about the things you're thankful for that day. This strengthens your bond and holds you accountable.

8. Volunteer or help others 

One of the most powerful ways to express gratitude is by giving back. Engage in volunteer activities or just offer to help someone in need. When you witness the impact of your actions on someone's life, it offers a fresh perspective and amplifies your feelings of gratitude.

 

The gratitude gap FAQs 

What is the gratitude gap?

The "gratitude gap" is a term that represents the space between the feelings of gratitude we experience and our actual expression of that gratitude. In other words, it's the disparity between what we feel in our hearts and what we communicate or show in our actions. This concept is essential because it highlights the importance of not only experiencing gratitude but also actively expressing it.

What are the 4 A's of gratitude? 

The "4 A's" of gratitude encompass four key aspects that help us better understand and practice gratitude effectively:

  • Awareness: The first "A" involves becoming aware of the positive things in your life. It's about taking a step back, being mindful, and recognizing the blessings and kindness you receive from others or life itself. Awareness is the foundation of gratitude because, without it, you won't identify the opportunities for gratitude.

  • Appreciation: Once you're aware of the positive elements in your life, the next step is appreciation. It's the act of truly valuing and acknowledging these things. This stage requires sincere acknowledgment and understanding of the significance of the blessings or acts of kindness you've encountered.

  • Acceptance: Acceptance refers to embracing the positive experiences, acknowledging that they exist, and allowing them to fill your heart with gratitude. It involves letting go of resistance and accepting the good in your life with an open heart.

  • Action: The final "A" involves taking action to express your gratitude. This may include thanking someone, performing acts of kindness in return, or simply finding ways to pay it forward. Action turns gratitude into a living, evolving practice, strengthening relationships and fostering a sense of interconnectedness.

What are the 3 types of gratitude? 

Gratitude can be categorized into three distinct types:

  • State gratitude: This is a temporary and situational type of gratitude. It arises in response to specific events, circumstances, or acts of kindness. State gratitude is often transient but can have an immediate positive impact on one's emotions and outlook.

  • Trait gratitude: Trait gratitude is a more enduring characteristic or personality trait. Individuals with high levels of trait gratitude tend to be naturally disposed to recognizing and appreciating the good in their lives consistently. This trait leads to a more optimistic, content, and positive outlook on life.

  • Expressed gratitude: Expressed gratitude is the type we actively communicate to others. It involves verbalizing or demonstrating our thankfulness, appreciation, or acknowledgment of the positive actions or support we receive. This type of gratitude strengthens relationships, fosters goodwill, and creates a positive social environment.

How does gratitude rewire your brain?

From a neuroscientific perspective, gratitude has the power to rewire the brain in several ways. When you practice gratitude, it increases the probability of changing your brain's neural pathways influenced and releasing neurotransmitters such as:

  • Dopamine: Expressing gratitude may stimulate the release of dopamine, which is associated with feelings of pleasure and reward. A surge of dopamine would reinforce the experience of gratitude, making you more likely to engage in thankful behaviors.

  • Serotonin: Gratitude may also help to balance the production of serotonin, which is responsible for regulating mood and reducing stress levels. Balanced serotonin levels may lead to an improved sense of well-being.

  • Oxytocin: Gratitude can boost oxytocin production. Oxytocin is often referred to as the "love hormone" or "bonding hormone", and it enhances social connections and trust, strengthening relationships and increasing feelings of connection with others.

Additionally, practicing gratitude can rewire neural pathways, promoting a more positive mindset and reducing the influence of negative thought patterns. Over time, the brain becomes more attuned to recognizing and appreciating the good in life, fostering a more optimistic and content outlook. 


Calm your mind. Change your life.

Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life. 

Images: Getty

 
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