What are emotional tears? The surprising science of crying

Mental Health

Jun 26

Written By Calm Editorial Team

Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA

Why do we cry? Explore the science behind emotional tears, how they differ by feeling, and 5 benefits of letting yourself cry.

Have you ever gotten a frustrating email from your boss and then the next thing you know you’re reaching for the tissue box? Or maybe you were out hiking and came across a beautiful waterfall, and then before you know it, tears are streaming down your face?

Emotional tears happen for a variety of reasons. They can surface out of nowhere, or they can come exactly when you think they would. This type of crying is a message from your body telling you that it needs a moment of care, and it’s also likely helping you to process complex feelings.

Experiencing intense emotions doesn’t make you too sensitive or too emotional. It’s helping to reset your nervous system and make you feel better. So, if you’re used to fighting your tears, maybe it’s time to reframe that reflex, and start working with them instead. So, grab our tissues, and let’s get our cry on.

What are emotional tears?

Emotional tears are the type of tears that happen when you’re feeling something deeply, even if you can’t quite name it. They’re different from the tears that are produced to protect your eyes from allergens, like dust. Emotional tears are about your inner world and can come from sadness, joy, anger, nostalgia, and shame.

They also contain stress-related biochemicals, which are natural painkillers. Basically, this means that crying is your body’s way of actively trying to soothe itself. It also tends to shift your breathing, loosens muscles, and move you from a state of stress into one of regulation.

Why do we cry?

From an evolutionary perspective, crying most likely developed as a survival tool. Before we had language, tears were a nonverbal way to signal things like pain, vulnerability, and need. In fact, they typically still work that way today, as most of us instinctively soften when we see someone cry and often want to help them feel better.

Crying can also be a way to see yourself more clearly. Tears show up when something inside of you—like grief, frustration, and joy—needs more room than words can offer. In those moments, crying can become that pause that your body needs to comprehend what’s going on in your inner world.

Culture, personality, hormones, and upbringing all play a role in how comfortable you feel with crying. Some people tear up very easily and often, while others can go years without shedding a tear. It’s different from person to person and one way isn’t necessarily better than the other.

5 benefits of emotional tears

Crying when you’re emotional isn’t something you need to hide or apologize for. It’s a natural release of emotions.

Here are five other ways emotional tears can help your wellbeing:

1. They help regulate your nervous system: Crying usually shifts your breathing pattern by slowing your inhales and maybe even making you sob or sigh. This activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which is the part of your body responsible for calming you down after a period of stress.

2. They release stress-related hormones: Studies show that emotional tears might carry stress hormones like cortisol and ACTH out of your body, which may help you feel a little lighter.

3. They increase connection and empathy: Tears signal to others that something important is happening, and more often than not, people respond with care. This tends to be a quiet yet powerful call for connection.

4. They improve your mood: Many people report feeling a sense of relief after crying. That’s especially true when the tears are allowed to flow freely without shame or interruption.

5. They may provide emotional clarity: Sometimes, you’re not even sure why you’re crying until you pause and tune in with yourself. Emotional tears often act as a compass, pointing you toward what matters most, even when it’s hard to articulate in words.

How to work with emotional tears: 8 tips to support your wellbeing

Sometimes emotional tears show up quietly. Other times, they arrive like a tidal wave. But no matter how they show up, they’re there to tell you something. Try not to judge the tears. Instead, embrace them as a signal to slow down and breathe.

1. Pause and notice what’s happening

When tears come up, avoid trying to immediately suppress or analyze them. Instead, just notice. Ask yourself questions like, “Where do you feel the emotion in your body?” and “What thoughts are circling?”

You could also put a hand on your chest and say silently, “This is emotion moving through me. It’s okay to feel this.”

💙 Listen to A Purposeful Pause with Jay Shetty to help you notice what’s happening as you move through your emotions.

2. Find a safe space to let the tears flow

Sometimes, we cry in less-than-ideal places like a crowded train or a workplace bathroom. Whenever possible, give yourself privacy to feel fully by stepping outside or going into a bathroom stall for a few minutes.

If privacy isn’t available, turn your body away from people to give yourself even a little bit more seclusion.

3. Support your body through the experience

Crying is physical. Your face, shoulders, breath all get involved. Once the tears slow down, check in with your body and find ways to soothe it.

You could stretch your arms overhead, unclench your hands, or even drink a glass of water. These small acts can signal to your body that you’re safe now.

4. Name the feeling (if you can)

Naming what you’re feeling can help you start to process your emotions. If it’s hard for you to name what you’re feeling, try using a feelings wheel to help you identify your emotions.

5. Notice your inner voice

Tears usually trigger internal commentary like, “I’m too sensitive.” or “What’s wrong with me?” But that voice isn’t helpful.

When you find yourself in a low place like this, talk to yourself like you’d talk to a close friend. You could say, “It makes sense you’re crying. That was a lot.”

Compassionate self-talk can really help soften the intensity of the moment.

6. Journal it out

If you’re feeling out of sorts after crying, writing can help you make sense of what came up. But try to avoid trying to fix or problem-solve. Just aim to get it out of your body and onto a page.

Start with these two prompts:

I think I was crying because…
Right now I feel…

7. Ask for some kindness and care from those you trust

Sometimes you need a blanket, a friend, or just five minutes alone. Other times you need someone to say, “I’ve got you.” Let yourself need, and let yourself ask.

You could ask for support from a friend by saying, “I’m feeling emotional right now. Could you just sit with me for a bit?” or “Can we take a quiet walk? I just need to move some feelings through.”

8. Give yourself a gentle exit ramp

After the tears stop, you could feel raw or even disoriented. That’s normal. Crying is basically an emotional workout.

To cool yourself down, do something grounding. Try washing your face, listening to a soft song, or eating something nourishing.

💙 Ground yourself post-cry by listening to Mellow Mood by Ian Mulder.

Emotional tears FAQs

Are tears different based on emotion?

Emotional tears are different from the ones your body produces to protect your eyes. They have stress hormones and natural painkillers in them, like leucine enkephalin. This suggests that crying is a built-in way for your body to cope with strong emotional states. A tear shed in relief hits differently than one shed in grief, and your body knows the difference.

Why do we cry even when we’re not sad?

Crying is a response to emotional intensity like joy, awe, anger, nostalgia, shame, or even relief.

You could even cry after a big test or while listening to music that moves something deep inside you. These moments may feel emotionally charged, and your tears are simply your body’s way of letting you know that this matters to you.

What are the benefits of emotional tears?

Emotional tears are a regulation tool. When you cry, your body usually transitions out of a fight-or-flight response and into a more grounded state.

Tears can help lower stress, release built-up emotion, and even strengthen your relationships by signaling to others that you’re in need of support. Typically after a good cry, many people feel clearer, lighter, or more connected to their emotions.

Why do some people cry more than others?

The amount you cry is influenced by a mix of biology, your upbringing, and social conditioning. Also, hormones like estrogen can make some people more prone to tears, which is why women may cry more often than men.

Additionally, people who are more emotionally attuned or who were raised in environments where crying was accepted might also cry more freely. On the flip side, some people could’ve learned to suppress tears, especially if they were taught that crying was weak, or inappropriate.

Is crying for no reason normal?

It’s normal to cry for no reason and is often more common than we admit. This type of crying is usually your body responding to something you haven’t fully registered yet. It could be emotional buildup, stress, or sensory overload.

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Calm Editorial Team