Dining solo? Here's how eating alone can affect your mental health

Personal Growth

Jun 2

Written By Calm Editorial Team

Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA

Eating alone can feel awkward — or incredibly freeing. Discover the pros and cons of dining solo on your mental health, plus 10 tips to enjoy it with more ease.

Picture this: you walk into a restaurant and ask for a table for one. How does this feel? Are you excited to sit by yourself, eat a fabulous meal, and people-watch? Or are you terrified that everyone in the restaurant will be judging you?

Eating alone can bring up all kinds of charged feelings, which makes sense given our world glorifies date nights, group dinners, and Sunday brunches.

While you might have been subconsciously taught that if you eat alone, you must be weird or have no friends, we’re here to invite you to let that go. Dining solo can be incredibly liberating, and it’s a rare opportunity to check in with yourself and not have to worry about being social. It’s just you, your food, and a moment to be present.

Whether eating alone feels like a rare opportunity for some solo time or sends a shiver down your spine, let’s explore the benefits of eating alone so you can better embrace it.

What are the benefits of eating solo?

For many of us, the idea of eating alone often gets treated like a backup plan. It’s what you do when no one else is free or your plans fall through. But solo dining doesn’t need to be a consolation prize. It can be an intentional and restorative choice if you let it.

Here are five reasons why eating alone can be good for you:

1. It strengthens your sense of autonomy: Eating solo can be a small way to reclaim agency. You can choose where to go, what to eat, and how long to linger. This might sound minor, but the cumulative effect of doing things on your own terms can build confidence. It’s a subtle but powerful way of practicing self-trust.

2. It creates space for mindfulness: When you eat alone, there’s more room to tune in to the texture of your food, the way your body feels, and the quiet around you. Solo meals offer a perfect opportunity to practice mindfulness without the pressure of meditating. You’re just present, bite by bite.

3. It supports emotional decompression: For people who feel overstimulated or emotionally depleted, eating alone can be a soft landing. It’s one of the few daily activities that can offer true solitude.

4. It invites intentional reflection: Eating alone often opens the door to reflection about your day or how you feel in your body. You could even find your mind wandering in a way that helps you process something you didn’t realize was still lingering.

5. It reduces performative habits: When no one’s watching, you get to eat how you actually eat, order what you actually want, and show up exactly as you are. That kind of unfiltered experience can feel grounding and freeing.

What are the potential drawbacks of eating alone?

Eating alone can be calming and empowering, but if you’re not that practiced at it, it can sometimes feel lonely or awkward. In other cases, some folks may use solo dining as a crutch or mask for deeper issues.

1. It can amplify feelings of loneliness: While solitude can be a healthy choice, it can also blur into loneliness, especially when it’s not intentional. If you regularly eat alone because of disconnection or a lack of support, it may impact your mood or self-worth.

2. It may reinforce isolation habits: If eating alone becomes a way to avoid vulnerability or social discomfort, it can keep you stuck in patterns that aren’t serving you. It can also deepen a sense of disconnection from others and from yourself.

3. It can feel socially stigmatized: If you already struggle with self-consciousness or social anxiety, dining solo might dial up those insecurities. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it, but it’s okay if it feels uncomfortable at first.

4. It removes opportunities for connection: When you consistently eat alone, you may miss those spontaneous moments of connection and bonding. Also, if solo dining becomes a default rather than a choice, your social world can gradually shrink.

5. It can disrupt eating habits for some people: For those struggling with disordered eating or body image issues, eating alone could remove the accountability that comes with shared meals. If this is something you experience, check in with your intentions. Make sure you’re eating solo for the right reasons.

If you feel like you’re practicing solo dining to avoid dealing with deeper issues, this is your sign to gently explore options for getting the support you need.

How to be more comfortable eating alone: 10 tips to enjoy your solo meals

If you’ve determined that you’re not using solo-dining to avoid behaviors or experiences that need your attention, let’s explore ways you can truly enjoy the experience.

Social conditioning may convey that solo dining is sad and lonely, but this narrative is outdated. Here are ten tips to up-level your next solo dinner date.

1. Start somewhere low-pressure

If dining solo at a formal restaurant feels too scary, start somewhere else. Try a café, a food truck, or a bookstore with a coffee bar. These spots have a more relaxed vibe and are filled with people doing their own thing.

Try this: Grab lunch from a local deli and eat it at a park where others are walking dogs, or eating on their own. This can help you feel anonymous, in a good way.

2. Bring a grounding activity

A book, a sketchpad, or a crossword can give your hands something to do and make you feel more comfortable. It can also signal to your nervous system that you’re okay.

Try this: Keep a small notebook in your bag. Then, use it to jot down what you notice or how you feel between bites.

💙 If you’re nervous before your solo meal, try a quick Grounding meditation with Tamara Levitt.

3. Plan your meal in advance

If you’re new to dining alone, too many unknowns can crank up the anxiety. So, choose your spot, check the menu online, or even pick a specific time when it’s quieter. This can help you feel a lot more in control.

Try this: Go for a late lunch at your neighborhood spot that you already know is calm and cozy. This will likely mean fewer people, less noise, and more comfort.

(Here are 20 affirmations to help calm your anxiety before dining solo.)

4. Make it a ritual, not just a workaround

Reframe solo dining as a ritual and not a plan B. If you’re eating at home, make it special! You could light a candle, set a nice place setting, grab your favorite mug or wine glass, and give yourself the same care and effort you’d offer a guest.

Try this: If you’re eating dinner alone at home, turn on a playlist that makes you smile, and eat from the “nice” plates you put out when friends come over.

💙 Turn your meal into a serene experience by listening to this Soothing Piano playlist.

5. Notice the discomfort — and ride the wave

If you feel awkward while eating alone, aim just to notice it and let it pass through you. You could also name what you feel and say, “I feel out of place.” Then gently ask yourself, “Is that feeling true, or just familiar?”

Try this: When a wave of self-consciousness hits, breathe into your body. Then, shift your focus away from who might be watching and toward how your food tastes.

6. Avoid leaning on your phone

Challenge yourself to occasionally eat without your phone, even for part of the meal. Notice what shifts when you don’t use distraction as a buffer.

Try this: Put your phone on silent and give yourself a 10-minute “presence window” at the start of your meal. If it’s awful, pick up your phone guilt-free. If not, consider staying unplugged for the rest of your meal.

7. Learn from other solo diners

If you feel self-conscious, look around and observe how others handle eating alone. Chances are, they’re doing just fine. Plus, if they don’t seem to care what anyone thinks, let that energy rub off on you.

Try this: Sit near a window or quietly observe who else is dining alone. Notice how they hold themselves, or if it feels right, say hello.

8. Give yourself something to look forward to afterward

If eating alone still feels vulnerable, anchor your meal with a post-dining reward. This can give your brain a built-in positive association and give you something to focus on.

Try this: Plan to pick up a dessert after your meal. Then enjoy it somewhere you enjoy, like a park or maybe the bath.

9. Redefine what a “successful” meal looks like

Success is showing up for yourself. If you tried something new and felt weird but did it anyway, that’s a win. If you had one peaceful bite before spiraling, that’s still progress.

Try this: After your meal, ask yourself what worked for you and what you might tweak the next time around.

10. Balance it out with connection

Eating alone too often might lead to feelings of isolation, so be sure to balance it out with time spent with friends and family. If you’re craving connection, invite someone over for a snack or plan a weekly meal with someone whose presence you genuinely enjoy.

Try this: Make Sunday brunch solo, but Monday lunch a shared experience. This way, you stay connected while still claiming some space for alone time.

Eating alone FAQs

Is eating alone bad for your mental health?

Eating alone isn’t necessarily bad for your mental health. It can be good for you when it's done intentionally. Solo meals can allow space for mindfulness, reflection, and emotional regulation, especially if your days are filled with constant stimulation.

The big difference is whether eating alone is a conscious choice or a sign of deeper social isolation. Eating alone is likely to serve your mental health if it genuinely feels restful or enjoyable.

On the flip side, if you’re eating solo because you feel disconnected or unseen, it could be worth exploring those patterns with curiosity and finding the support you need.

Can it be empowering to eat out alone?

It can definitely be empowering to eat out alone, as it pushes back against social scripts that tell us we always need to be in groups, partnered, or performing. Sitting down at a table alone and deciding you’re allowed to enjoy your meal without shame is self-trust in action.

Occupying space and nourishing yourself without apology can be incredibly grounding and maybe even exciting.

How can I feel less awkward when eating out alone?

Feeling awkward signals that you’re doing something unfamiliar or vulnerable. So, choose a comfortable environment where solo diners are common, like cafés or bakeries. Giving yourself a grounding activity like reading can help as well. (Here are 15 more grounding activities to try.)

You can also reframe the experience. Instead of thinking, “People must think I’m weird,” try, “This is me taking care of myself.” Chances are, most people around you aren’t paying attention.

Is it normal to only want to eat alone?

Some people genuinely prefer solitude during meals. It’s when they process their thoughts and unwind from the day, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Also, for introverts or people with sensory sensitivities, eating alone could even feel like a much-needed reprieve.

That said, if your desire to eat alone is driven by fear, it’s worth checking in with yourself. Avoiding social meals because of overwhelm or insecurity might be a sign that something deeper needs support.

Can eating alone help with my mindfulness?

Eating solo can be a great mindfulness tool. Without conversation or external distractions, you’re more likely to notice the textures and flavors of your meal. You may also become more aware of your body’s hunger and fullness cues, which can support intuitive eating.

Even if you’re not doing a mindful eating practice, just taking a few moments to breathe and notice your surroundings can shift your nervous system out of fight-or-flight mode. Plus, it can help you reconnect with your inner world.

Calm your mind. Change your life.

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Calm Editorial Team