How to read body language for better emotional awareness
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA
Learn how to read people's body language using the psychology of nonverbal communication. Plus, how reading body language can boost deeper emotional awareness.
Body language is when someone sees you, and you know instantly that they’re truly happy to see you because of their smile or their demeanor. Body language can also be seen in smaller ways, like when a friend crosses their arms when you share feedback, and you get a feeling that they aren't open to what you’re saying. We all use body language to communicate. The better you can read it, the more emotionally aware you can become.
What is body language?
Body language is made up of many parts. How you move your arms when you talk, how you stand, the way you sit, and even the small movements of your eyes and face. They all tell a story about what you're thinking and feeling. For example, eye contact while speaking to someone can show confidence, while a tap of the foot might show that you're impatient or nervous.
Every day, whether we're at home, hanging out with friends, or in a meeting, we're using body language to nonverbally express ourselves. Learning how to read body language means you can begin to notice things that you might otherwise miss, like the real meaning behind a smile or why someone’s behaving a certain way. It's not just about a singular movement. It's how all those signals come together to help you understand people even better than before. It's a powerful tool because it helps you communicate and connect with others in a deeper, more meaningful way.
You've been using body language to communicate since you were a baby. Babies don't have words, but they can still tell you if they're happy, sad, hungry, or tired. As we grow up, we begin to communicate verbally, but that doesn’t mean our bodies aren’t telling a story.
Body language isn’t an exact science
While body language can provide amazing insights, it's important to remember that it isn't a perfect science. The way people express themselves can be influenced by a whole host of factors, including their culture, personal experiences, and even the situation at hand.
Not all body language cues mean the same thing for everyone. For instance, a gesture considered friendly in one culture might be seen as rude in another. Plus, individual differences mean that what signifies comfort or happiness for one person might not apply to someone else. It's vital to consider the context and the individual when reading body language to avoid misunderstandings. There isn’t a one-size-fits-all rule, but you can become attentive to the specific ways people communicate without words.
5 benefits of understanding body language signs
1. Better connection with people: When you know how to read body language, you can typically have a better understanding of what people are feeling. This can help you connect with them on a level that words alone can't reach, which can improve your relationships.
2. Improved conversations: Being able to interpret body language can help you avoid misunderstandings. In seeing beyond words, you’re better able to respond not just to what someone is saying but also to what they're really feeling.
3. Great workplace communication: In the professional world, the better you are at reading body language, the smoother your interactions can be. Whether you're leading a team, dealing with clients, or collaborating with colleagues, understanding body language can help bring effective communication.
4. Increased intuition: Sometimes, people say one thing but mean another. By paying attention to body language, you might be able to spot when the words don't match the mood. This can help you figure out when to probe a little deeper or offer support.
5. Enhanced self-awareness: Understanding body language also means getting to know your own signals—are you really as open as you’d like to be, or does your body tell a different story? By being aware of your own nonverbal cues, you can adjust them to match how you want to be seen. Reading your own body language can also help you spot areas of tension and stress, like hunched shoulders, so you can work on relaxing them.
How to read people? Body language 101
Understanding body language can help you read the unspoken words that people share. By watching and listening to their cues, you'll become more in tune with the world around you and the people you share it with.
Pay attention to their eyes
Notice where someone is looking—are they making eye contact? This could mean they're interested in what you're saying. If their eyes are darting around, they might be distracted or uncomfortable.
Watch their facial expressions
A person’s face can tell you a lot about how they’re feeling inside. Look out for smiles, which can showcase happiness or joy. Frowns can be a sign of discontent, or raised eyebrows, which can indicate skepticism or distrust.
Observe their arm movements
Keep an eye on people's arms—are they crossed, or are they relaxed at their sides? Crossed arms often mean someone is putting up a barrier, while relaxed arms can suggest they're open to what's around them.
Notice their legs posture
Legs can reveal feelings, too. A person bouncing their legs might be anxious or just have a lot of energy, while someone with their legs crossed could be feeling closed off. But, remember, neither could be true, and they might just feel comfortable sitting that way.
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Observe overall posture
Posture speaks volumes. Those who stand tall might be feeling confident, while someone slouching might be less sure of themselves. Standing tall and taking up space are surefire signs you’re experiencing confidence and are self-assured. And even if you’re not? Fake it ‘til you make it.
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Notice how much space they take up
Personal space can be a big part of body language. If someone stands closer to you, they might be showing they're comfortable and friendly. But if they keep their distance, they might need more space to feel at ease.
Tune into their tone of voice
The way someone speaks is part of body language, too. Listen to the tone of their voice. Is it soft, loud, fast, or slow? This can tell you if they're excited, upset, or something else. Some people are naturally loud talkers, while others are more soft spoken, but even this can tell you a lot about a person.
How to read body language FAQs
What is negative body language?
Negative body language includes the nonverbal signals that we give off when we're not feeling friendly or are upset. For example, if someone has their arms folded tightly across their chest, they might be feeling defensive—or just not open to chatting. If they avoid eye contact, they might be feeling shy or want to be left alone. These simple gestures can tell others about our mood.
How do you read someone's body language to see if they like you?
When someone likes you, their body language tends to be more open and engaged. They might lean in when you're talking, which shows they're really listening and interested. They'll probably make plenty of eye contact, too, because they're focused on you. You might also catch them mirroring your own movements, which means they're in sync with you. These are all good signs that someone enjoys your company.
What is the body language of a suspicious person?
If someone's being suspicious, their body language might show it. They could avoid eye contact or look around a lot, as if they're keeping an eye out for something. Their movements might be quick or fidgety, and they might not stand still, often shifting their weight from one foot to another. Sometimes, they might put barriers between themselves and others, like holding a bag in front of them or crossing their arms.
What is the body language pose for confidence?
A confident person's body language is usually all about taking up space and being open. They might stand tall with their hands on their hips or by their sides and their head held high. They might make steady eye contact, which shows they're comfortable in the situation. Their movements could be smooth rather than jerky, giving off an air of calm and control. When they sit, they might lean back a bit, showing they're relaxed and sure of themselves.
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