Why parental stress is worse than ever (and how to handle it)
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
Experts have warned that parents are more stressed out than ever — but why? Explore the reasons for parental stress, how to handle it, and where to get help.
Raising children has always been hard work, but today’s parents are facing more challenges and pressures than ever before.
The U.S. surgeon general released an advisory in 2024 warning that parental stress has become a major public health issue, leaving parents “feeling exhausted, burned out and perpetually behind.” The reason? Modern-day moms and dads face a new expectation that they should spend as much time and money on their children’s education and enrichment as possible, according to the report. Researchers added that modern-day parents worry that if they don’t give their children a leg up, their kids’ future might be in jeopardy.
With the stakes so high, it’s no wonder so many parents are struggling. Here’s how you can better cope if you’re a parent.
What is parental stress and why is it such an issue today?
Parental stress is exactly what it sounds like: a type of psychological stress triggered by the many demands, responsibilities, and expectations that come with raising children. It can show up as worry, irritability, exhaustion — and sometimes even a sense of helplessness.
With parenting becoming more complex and the pressures of modern life increasing, the issue of parental stress is more prominent now than it has ever been.
7 common reasons for parental stress
The surgeon general’s advisory revealed that 41% of parents say that most days they’re so stressed that they can’t function, and 49% report that most days their stress is completely overwhelming compared to other adults (20% and 26%, respectively). That’s because modern-day parenting comes with a long list of challenges, from financial concerns to anxiety around maintaining a work-life balance.
1. Balancing work and family life
For many parents, managing a job alongside caregiving can be one of the biggest stressors. According to the surgeon general’s advisory, parents are working more than ever, and trying to balance their careers with their family responsibilities often result in anxiety, guilt, and burnout. “Evidence suggests that demands from both work and child caregiving have come at the cost of quality time with one’s partner, sleep, and parental leisure time,” it adds.
2. Financial pressures
Raising a child is expensive, from basic needs like food and clothing to education and extracurriculars. Plus, childcare prices have shot up 26% in the U.S., the advisory states. Understandably, financial worries often top the list of parental stressors, especially with the rising cost of living. For some, providing opportunities for their children can bring guilt or anxiety if finances are tight.
3. Parenting expectations and “comparison culture”
Social media and society’s emphasis on perfect parenting can create unrealistic expectations. The pressure to be an ideal parent can be overwhelming, especially with social media showcasing seemingly flawless families. This often leads to feelings of inadequacy or worry about not measuring up.
4. Limited time for self-care and relaxation
Busy schedules can leave little room for parents to recharge, which can lead to burnout. Without time for self-care, stress accumulates, making it harder to manage everyday parenting challenges with patience and clarity.
5. Worries about children’s wellbeing, safety and future
The responsibility of caring for a child’s health, education, social life, and emotional development can weigh heavily on parents. In fact, nearly 75% of parents are extremely or somewhat concerned that their child will struggle with anxiety or depression, according to the advisory. With concerns like bullying, violence, academic pressure, and future career prospects, the desire to ensure children’s happiness and success can cause constant worry.
6. Lack of social support
Raising children without a support network can make parenting feel isolating. For many, extended family may not be nearby, and finding reliable friends or community support can be challenging. Without support, everyday challenges can feel much harder to handle.
7. Navigating parenting in a digital age
Technology brings both convenience and stress for parents today, as they navigate screen time rules, social media, and online safety for their kids. With constant information on what’s good or bad for kids with technology, parents often feel confused and unsure about the best approach.
How to handle parental stress: 10 helpful tips
Parenting is hard — and the reality is, it may not get much easier any time soon. Still, as the surgeon general’s advisory states: “Caregivers need care, too.” Many issues are systemic and out of our control, but we can make small changes to improve our mental health. Here are 10 tips to help you ease at least some of that parental pressure.
1. Let go of perfection and embrace being present
Despite what you may be led to believe on social media, no caregiver has it all figured out. Remind yourself that your goal is not to be perfect — but to be present and responsive to your children’s needs. Set realistic expectations for yourself and your family, and be willing to adjust them as needed.
Some days will go smoothly, and others might feel chaotic. Try to focus on what matters most and give yourself grace when you lose your temper or make a mistake. Need a little help with this? We’ve got six tips to help you stop being a perfectionist.
2. Bring mindfulness into what you’re already doing
Mindfulness can be a powerful tool for reducing stress, and it doesn’t require a big time commitment. Simple mindfulness exercises, like taking a few deep breaths, noticing what’s around you, or even just focusing on how you feel in the moment, can help you stay calm.
If you’re new to mindfulness, start small. Try pausing for a few moments during everyday activities, like when you’re washing dishes, folding laundry, or waiting in the school pickup line. Check out these five simple ways to practice mindfulness in your daily life. Just a few minutes of breathing deeply or noticing the sights and sounds around you can help ground you and ease the feeling of being overwhelmed.
3. Care for yourself as well as your family
When so many people depend on you to care for them, it’s easy to deprioritize doing things for yourself. Still, consistent, small acts of self-care can have a big impact on how you feel. We know: putting yourself first is tough when you’re a parent. So here are 20 self-care practices to help you prioritize your wellbeing.
Start by adding a few minutes of “me time” into your day. This can be as simple as drinking your coffee before the kids wake up, reading a chapter of a book you enjoy before bed, or just stepping outside for fresh air.
💙 Learn simple tools to support your mental and emotional well-being as you navigate the whirlwind of parenting during the Ease Parental Stress series with Jeff Warren.
4. Ask for help when (or before!) it all gets too much
Sometimes, sharing your feelings with someone who cares can lighten the load. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, talk to a friend or family member about what’s going on. We get that it’s tough to ask for help sometimes, whether it’s emotional or practical help that you need, so check out our seven tips for when and how to ask for help. You might consider connecting with other parents through local groups, online communities, or even casual meetups in your area.
If you’re facing specific challenges, a counselor or therapist can offer professional guidance and support. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness, and having a support network can make a big difference in how you handle stress.
5. Set boundaries for work and family time
If you’re balancing work and parenting, setting boundaries can help reduce the feeling of being pulled in multiple directions. If possible, communicate your work hours and expectations to your boss or colleagues so they understand when you won’t be responding to messages.
Even if your work situation doesn’t allow strict boundaries, try setting a routine that gives you a break between work and family time — like going for a short walk, changing into comfortable clothes, or doing a quick breathing exercise. These small actions help create a mental shift from work mode to family mode, making it easier to be fully present at home.
💙 Try a Shut Down Routine to help you end your day in an intentional way with Chibs Okereke.
6.Take pride in your own parenting style (and avoid comparisons)
It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to other parents, especially with social media constantly showing highlight reels of everyone else’s lives. Remind yourself that what you see online is just a snapshot and not the whole story. Every family is unique, and what works for someone else might not be right for you.
Instead of comparing yourself to others, focus on your own strengths and celebrate the small wins. You’re doing your best, and that’s more than enough. Taking pride in what’s working for your family can help reduce feelings of inadequacy and make you feel more confident in your parenting.
7. Create calming routines — and stick to them
Having routines, even small ones, can create a sense of stability and reduce daily stress. Simple changes—like having a quick breakfast with your kids before everyone heads off to work or school, or reading a story together before bed—can introduce more comfort into your life, and give you new opportunities to bond with your family. Plus, routines can help you feel more organized, making it easier to manage daily tasks.
8. Practice gratitude daily
You don’t have to keep a formal journal or write anything down if that feels like too much — just try to take a few moments each day to think about one or two things you’re grateful for. Especially on tough days, this can help shift your perspective and ease stress. It can be as simple as a moment of laughter with your child, hitting all green lights on your commute home, or having a few minutes of quiet.
💙 Feel like you want to keep a log of the good things in your life? Download our Daily Gratitude Journal to get started.
9. Keep family activities simple and achievable
Big events or trips can be exciting, but they often come with their own stressors. If you’re feeling especially overwhelmed, skip anything that feels overly taxing in favor of simpler family activities that don’t require a lot of extra planning.
A walk in the park, a family game night, or even cooking a meal together can be just as enjoyable and help everyone relax.
10. Take things one day at a time
Parenting is a marathon, not a sprint, and there will be good days and tough days. Try to be present as much as you can, and when you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a deep breath and remind yourself to tackle one thing at a time.
Some days will feel harder than others, and it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. Focus on the small, meaningful moments with your children, and remind yourself that every step, no matter how small, is moving you forward.
Parental stress FAQs
What are signs that parental stress is becoming too much to handle?
Parental stress is common, but when it becomes overwhelming, it can interrupt your daily life and impact your health and wellbeing. You might become short-tempered with loved ones, feel like you're racing against time, or lose interest in hobbies and social activities.
Some of the other common signs of excessive stress include constant fatigue, irritability, trouble sleeping, and feeling on edge. You may also experience physical symptoms like headaches, muscle tension, and frequent illnesses. If these symptoms persist or worsen, reach out for support from friends, family, or professional therapists to find ways to manage stress and regain a sense of balance in your life.
How can parents with limited time practice mindfulness?
Mindfulness can be quick and simple, even on busy days. Incorporate it into daily activities—like drinking your morning coffee or showering—by focusing on your breathing and surroundings. Busy parents can also try a quick body scan, noticing sensations from head to toe, to reconnect with themselves and feel more present. (Check out this step-by-step guide to practicing a body scan.)
Taking deep breaths during stressful moments or while waiting in line can also help you feel more grounded and less reactive. These small mindful practices can significantly enhance your sense of calm throughout the day.
Can mindfulness techniques help improve relationships with children?
Mindfulness is all about being in the moment, which can help you better appreciate the time you spend with your children. When you’re being present, you naturally focus on your child's expressions and needs. This helps your kids feel seen and valued, strengthening your bond.
During frustrating times, mindfulness can help you stay calm leading to more positive outcomes and interactions. Find out how you can use mindfulness to improve your relationships.
What are some effective self-care practices specifically for parents?
When you’re taking care of children, it’s easy to put your own needs last. Still, simple acts of self-care can have an impact on how you feel.
Carve out small pockets of time for activities you enjoy, like reading, stretching, or listening to music, to feel more energized and grounded.
Try to get enough sleep, stay hydrated, and eat balanced meals to boost energy and resilience.
Maintain your social connections, even if it just involves having brief chats with friends or other parents, to help reduce stress.
Focus on activities that bring you joy, like drawing, spending time outdoors, or taking a relaxing bath, and try to incorporate them into your routine.
How can parental stress affect children’s wellbeing?
Parental stress can impact children, who are perceptive to their parents' moods and energy. When parents are stressed, children may feel anxious or unsettled, interpreting the tension as a sign of trouble.
Chronic stress can make kids feel insecure if their parents become less patient or emotionally available, potentially leading to behavioral changes like acting out or withdrawing.
Calm your mind. Change your life.
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