How to teach your kids the real meaning of Valentine's Day
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
It's not just candy hearts! Learn how to share the real meaning of Valentine's Day with the kids in your life, and 8 ways you can celebrate the day of love with them.
Valentine’s Day for kids usually means one thing: stuff. Cards, candy, classroom parties, those last-minute Target runs for a box of valentines featuring whatever cartoon character your kid is currently obsessed with. It’s cute. It’s chaotic. And it’s often completely missing the point.
At its core, Valentine’s Day is a celebration of love, and a reminder that love comes in all forms: friendship, family, kindness to others, and yes, even self-love.
So, how do we help our kids see that Valentine’s Day is about more than just candy and cards? How do we teach them that love isn’t something you just give — it’s something you show?
Luckily, teaching kids the real meaning of Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be time-consuming or stressful. Here are a few simple, meaningful ideas to make sure your holiday is packed with love.
How to teach your kids about Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day should be about more than candy and colorful cartoon valentines, but when you’re a kid, those seem pretty important too. To get through to them, it’s important to keep things simple.
Focus on what they can feel and see in their own lives: love, kindness, and the way our words and actions make others feel.
Here are a few ways to break it down for them in a way that actually sticks.
Love isn’t just for couples
One of the biggest misconceptions about Valentine’s Day is that it’s all about romance. But kids need to know that love comes in all forms — family, friends, pets, teachers, even the neighbor who always waves hello. Ask them, “Who are some people in your life that make you feel happy, safe, or loved?” Their answers might surprise you.
Kindness is a way to show love
Love isn’t just said, it’s shown — and not just through gifts. Talk about how small acts of kindness, like helping a friend, saying something nice, or sharing their favorite toy, are ways to show love. These seven tips on how to be a better friend can serve as inspiration for your talk too.
Words matter (and so do actions)
Kids hear “I love you” all the time, but it’s tough to know how much of it they really understand. Help them make the connection by talking about how words and actions go together. Saying “I love you” to a parent is wonderful, but hugging them, helping them, or drawing them a picture is love in action.
Self-love is just as important
This one might take a little more explaining, but teaching kids to be kind to themselves—to talk nicely about themselves, to rest when they’re tired, to believe in their own worth—is one of the most powerful Valentine’s Day lessons they can learn. (Most adults are still working on that one too!) These 50 positive affirmations for kids can be a good way to help them feel better about themselves.
History, but make it quick
If your kid is the curious type, you can share a bite-sized version of how Valentine’s Day started — even though the origins are a little murky. Try something like: “Nobody really knows exactly how Valentine’s Day started, but over the years, people turned February 14 into a special day to celebrate love.” Keep it simple, and they’ll get the idea.
8 ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your kids
Once you’ve covered what Valentine’s Day is about, you may want to find ways to celebrate it in a meaningful way — without requiring Pinterest-level craft skills or making a gigantic mess of your kitchen table.
At the end of the day, Valentine’s Day with kids doesn’t have to be about more stuff. It’s about creating little moments that make them feel loved, connected, and seen. And whether that happens over heart-shaped cookies, a scavenger hunt, or an extra bedtime snuggle, the real Valentine’s Day magic is in those everyday acts of love.
Here are eight ideas to make the day of love extra special for your kids.
1. Make homemade valentines
Sure, you could buy a pack of 30 pre-made valentines, but if you have the time and energy, try turning it into a sweet activity by having them write (or dictate) something specific and kind about each friend.
Ask questions like:
What’s something you like about this person?
What’s something they’ve done that made you feel happy?
It doesn’t have to be deep, “You always share your fruit snacks” is prime kindergarten-level friendship. Still, the act of thinking about why they appreciate someone can make handing out the cards feel extra-special.
2. Create a “love jar” for the family
This is an easy way to encourage gratitude and appreciation without putting everyone on the spot.
It’s actually a pretty simple exercise:
Grab a jar, some slips of paper, and some crayons or pens.
Have everyone in the family write down (or dictate) things they love about each other.
Read them out loud at dinner or before bedtime.
Expect a mix of sweetness (“I love that Mommy always makes me waffles”) and randomness (“I love that Dad does funny voices for the dog”). Either way, it’s a win.
💙 Is your child a “Trolls” fan? In Adventures in Perfect Harmony, Poppy, from the hit movie, tells stories about gratitude, self-love, and more.
3. Have a kindness scavenger hunt
Turn Valentine’s Day into a challenge by making a list of small, loving actions your kids can do throughout the day. Some ideas include:
Give someone a compliment.
Draw a picture for a family member or friend.
Say “thank you” without being reminded.
Do something nice for a sibling (yes, even if they’re annoying).
Say a friendly hello to a neighbor or classmate.
If they check off a certain number of tasks, they get a small prize — maybe an extra bedtime story, a special snack, or a trip to the playground.
4. Bake or decorate Valentine’s treats together
You don’t have to be a master baker, just grab some store-bought cookie dough, frosting, and all the heart-shaped decorations you can find. The kids will love it.
And if you want to sneak in a little extra meaning, have your child package up a few cookies for neighbors, teachers, or friends.
5. Read books about love and kindness
Books are a simple, cozy way to reinforce the idea that love isn’t just about romance — it’s about connection, friendship, and caring for others. Look for stories that focus on themes like:
Friendship and appreciation: Books that highlight how friends support and care for each other in everyday ways
Family love: Stories that show the many ways families express love, from bedtime stories to small acts of kindness
Kindness and empathy: Books that help kids understand the importance of being kind to others and how even small actions can make a big difference
Self-love and confidence: Stories that encourage kids to see their own strengths, embrace who they are, and practice self-kindness
Check out your local library or bookstore for children’s books that explore these themes in a fun and engaging way. Many libraries also have special Valentine’s Day displays with books that celebrate love in all its forms, making it easy to find the perfect read.
💙 Learn Kindness with Cinderella is a meditation perfect for teaching kids to spread kindness — and to be kind to themselves too.
6. Do a family gratitude check-in
Valentine’s Day is the perfect excuse to slow down and take a second to appreciate each other. At dinner or bedtime, go around and have each person share:
One thing they love about their family
One thing someone did that made them feel special
One way they can show love to others
You might be surprised by the answers. (“I love that Daddy always carries me upstairs when I’m sleepy” will hit you right in the feels.)
7. Practice self-love together
Because the best lesson we can teach our kids? That love isn’t just something we give to others — it’s something we should give to ourselves, too.
Some simple self-love ideas:
Have a cozy night in with pajamas, a movie, and a favorite snack
Talk about things you love about yourselves (harder for us adults, but worth it!)
Make a “Things I Like About Me” list together
Helping kids build self-worth early is one of the best gifts we can give them—and these five self-compassion exercises are a great place to start.
💙 Listen to Let Your Light Shine with Tiana — a meditation for kids all about how to nurture the light that shines within them.
8. Spread some love beyond your family
Valentine’s Day is a great chance to teach kids that love isn’t just about the people closest to us, it’s about community too.
Some easy, kid-friendly ways to give back:
Make cards for a local nursing home or hospital
Donate to a food bank or pack a few bags of snacks for people in need
Bring a small treat or blanket to a local animal shelter
Helping others feel loved is one of the best ways to celebrate the day, and it teaches kids that kindness is what truly makes the world go ‘round.
Valentine's day for kids FAQs
How can I teach my kids about Valentine’s Day?
The best way to teach kids about Valentine’s Day is to show them that love isn’t just about gifts or grand gestures — it’s about connection, kindness, and appreciation. Start by explaining that Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate all the people who make our hearts happy, whether that’s family, friends, teachers, or even pets.
You can also model love through small, everyday actions, like writing a thoughtful note for them, pointing out kind things they do for others, or reading books that explore love in all its forms. The key is to make it about more than just candy and cards — help them see that love is something we do, not just something we say.
What are some Valentine's Day gifts for kids?
If you want to go beyond the usual candy and stuffed animals, consider gifts that encourage creativity, connection, or kindness. A new book about love or friendship can be a great way to reinforce the holiday’s message while giving them something to enjoy long after February 14.
A DIY coupon book filled with experiences—like a special movie night, an extra bedtime story, or a one-on-one outing—can make the day feel personal and meaningful. Small craft kits, a journal where they can write things they love about themselves, or even a tiny plant they can take care of are also thoughtful options.
The best gifts aren’t necessarily things — they’re moments that help kids feel seen, loved, and valued.
What should I teach kids about Valentine’s Day?
Teach kids that Valentine’s Day is about all kinds of love. Love can be between friends, family members, and even for themselves. Explain that it’s not just about giving and receiving gifts but about showing appreciation and kindness.
Encourage them to think about the ways they already experience love in their daily lives — through hugs, kind words, shared laughter, and small acts of care. Help them understand that love isn’t about perfection or fancy gifts; it’s about being there for each other, lifting each other up, and making the people around us feel special.
How can I make Valentine’s Day special for the kids in my life?
Making Valentine’s Day memorable is all about helping your child feel seen and loved. Try starting their day with a heartfelt note or a little surprise, like a homemade heart-shaped pancake or a love note tucked into their lunchbox. Spend time doing something together, whether that’s baking, reading, making valentines for others, or even just discussing what you love about each other.
Kids remember the feeling of special moments more than the details — so whatever you do, keep it simple, focus on connection, and let them soak in the love.
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